Let me start by saying this is not to boast or brag. This is for me, for me to not feel too bad about where I am in life. I’m 23, just 23.
By the age I am now, I have done the following:
- Graduated from college
- Published 16 essays
- Published 15 poems (well, 14, but one is scheduled for December)
- Had a poetry chapbook accepted for publication (even thought the press closed, I’m considering it a win)
- Became Assistant Editor for Sundress Publications
- Got accepted into graduate school (even though I couldn’t attend)
- Finished 2 fiction books (though I was 14 and 16 at the time and I would never, EVER publish them without heavy editing or at all, still a win, right?)
- Became a mentor/big sister to several people
- Started my own business
And I’m sure that I’ve left some stuff off of the list, but all of this is to say that I have to be kinder to myself. I have done a lot for being so young, and I don’t give myself the credit I deserve. I don’t allow myself to relish in the small things; I keep working and writing until “something better” comes. This is not healthy, and it’s not my time yet for things. It’s okay to not have it together all the time. Wanting something to happen before it wants to happen can be toxic, so I’m dropping the attitude of I have to accomplish X by Y age. (Well for the most part. Babies and marriage I definitely want by 30 so I can have a healthy pregnancy, but that’s besides the point.)
I’m 23. I can’t go back in time and change things, but I can be more positive for the future. I have my life ahead of me to make a difference. I woke up this morning. I need to relish in that.